Transcript – Something on the Wind

[Quest of Ruin theme plays]

ANNOUNCER
Scroll and Dagger presents:
Quest of Ruin
Episode Twenty-Four
Something on the Wind

[Theme fades to urban background noise, with sounds of stationery and dice in the foreground.]

GAME MASTER
Hello and welcome to Quest of Ruin, the post-apocalyptic fantasy roleplaying podcast. I am your host and Game Master. Last time, you were able to get into the secret vaults of the Sonrai College where you found many secrets and treasures waiting for you –

WILL
Along with a fresh batch of nightmare fuel.

GAME MASTER
A mysterious fungus and entangling vines that attempted to trap you inside the Vault. You were able to escape thanks to a good bit of magic from Vurieth.

ROSIE
Yeah, untamed magic isn’t too shabby.

MATT
Considering what I had to roll to get that to work, I’d rather have my old magic back, thanks.

GINA
I’m working on it. I can start translating now right?

LEAH
Yeah, you said she could start when we got out of the vault.

GAME MASTER
Well yes, but there’s one thing you need to settle first.

WILL
Oh God, what?

GAME MASTER
Okay, so you’d found the rubbing Master Sonrai had made of the Stone of Caled’elu. You leave the vault and are once again standing in the ruins of the Sonrai College. The problem now is, where do you go next?

ROSIE
Can’t we just go back the way we came?

GINA
Not enough rations.

MATT
Wasn’t there somewhere near the College we could go to? I remember you mentioning somewhere before we went through the mountains.

GAME MASTER
The settlement of Sacara lies to the south of your position. However, there is a problem.

ROSIE
Of course there is.

[Transitioning to the vault of Sonrai College, the party argues.]

LAETHAR
No, absolutely not.

AIOLIN
I agree, there has to be a better option.

YAELA
What better option? You said yourself, there’s nowhere around for miles!

BALINK
Miles and miles!

LAETHAR
Nowhere that we know of. It’s been a few years since I was last here, who knows what might have sprung up since then.

VURIETH
What is wrong with this Sacara place?

AIOLIN
Didn’t you ever meet any of them? Sacara isn’t all that far from the Ashen Plains. Calenann Forest lies between them, I believe?

VURIETH
No, I never have. The caravans never went that far north. Really the furthest we ever went from the Plains was Halfport, for the market. As far as I know, no caravan ever even crossed the Caleun River.

LAETHAR
I believe your elven ancestors likely told the people of Lithmelin to stay away from that northern border. And I’d say they were right to do so.

BALINK
I don’t get it.

AIOLIN
The Sacaran people are quite an… insular bunch.

LAETHAR
Insular. Xenophobic. Mistrustful of any who are not one of their own, be they elf, orc or other humans. And the many centuries of isolation have likely done nothing to soothe that temperament.

AIOLIN
Which means moving through might get unpleasant. None of us exactly look like them.

VURIETH
Perhaps I might be able to pass for one of them? If I just hid my ears –

AIOLIN
I’m afraid your complexion will be a bit of a giveaway that you’re not one of their number.

LAETHAR
Not that it matters anyway. No Sacaran would be seen travelling with people like us.

YAELA
But where else is there that we can go?

[Paper rustles as the map is unrolled.]

AIOLIN
[sighs] Nowhere.

LAETHAR
But there might –

AIOLIN
[firmly] No, Laethar, there isn’t. Look, back the way we came, the nearest settlement is Kapulbaur and we don’t have enough rations to get there. North is impassable because of the mountains so we’d have to follow the Malrrug Road all the way around but we’d run out of food before we got anywhere. And west is nothing until we get to the Bright Mountains and you, more than anyone, know what lies that way.

LAETHAR
[sighs] Yes, alright, I see your point. South to Sacara then.

BALINK
Alright, so, which way we going?

AIOLIN
Um – right, see here? The river?

LAETHAR
That would be the Ilaluin.

AIOLIN
Right. That runs from here, by Dol Ilnas, down south all the way to this little cluster of mountains. That’s where Sacara is.

YAELA
So we just need to follow the river.

AIOLIN
Pretty much. If we can, we should find a boat. That’ll make the journey quicker.

VURIETH
Oh, ah, must we?

BALINK
Yeah, I’m not too keen on, y’know, being on water.

YAELA
We might have to, if we want to make sure we reach Sacara before we run out of food.

BALINK
[gags] Oh great.

LAETHAR
Come on then. If we set off now, we can find a good place to camp. We can find the river in the morning.

VURIETH
Right.

[Laethar, Balink, and Vurieth begin to move off.]

YAELA
Aiolin?

AIOLIN
Hm?

YAELA
You alright?

AIOLIN
Yeah, just getting a last look at the place. Don’t know when I’ll be coming back after all, if ever.

YAELA
Would you want to?

AIOLIN
Suppose not. It’s not my home anymore. What it was… is gone.

YAELA
Not all of it. That statue, at least, will stand for years to come.

AIOLIN
I suppose.

YAELA
Are you going to put the key back?

AIOLIN
No, I think I’ll hold onto it. We might need the vault again one day. And besides, it’ll stop whatever that stuff is in there getting out.

YAELA
That’s true. Come on, we should catch up with the others.

AIOLIN
Yeah. After you.

[Yaela moves on, and Aiolin sighs.]

AIOLIN
… Goodbye.

[Aiolin moves away, and transitioning to the riverbank, water splashes.]

YAELA
Well, here we are. The Ilaluin River. We’ve made good time.

LAETHAR
We still have a way to go but if we stick close, it should make the journey easier.

VURIETH
[barely hiding relief] No sign of a boat, unfortunately. I suppose we shall have to walk.

YAELA
How long will that take?

LAETHAR
All the way there? Probably two weeks, maybe ten days if we pace ourselves well.

YAELA
I hope one of you is good at fishing.

[There’s a brief pause.]

BALINK
I did bang-fishing one time.

AIOLIN
Bang-fishing?

YAELA
What is that?

VURIETH
I think I may have an idea…

LAETHAR
As do I…

BALINK
Well! So, you get the river right? Or pond, or puddle, or anything like that. Then you get your ’splosives – flash bangs, grenades, whatever you’ve got – then you chuck ‘em in and –

YAELA
I do not think that will be necessary, but thank you.

BALINK
Aw!

LAETHAR
There may well be some small settlements who’ll sell us a boat. We might even be able to resupply enough that we won’t need to go all the way to Sacara.

AIOLIN
Worst comes to worst we could build some sort of makeshift boat, I suppose. There’s a lot of wood around here. And the river runs south anyway, so we wouldn’t need a sail or anything. A decent sized raft could do.

LAETHAR
Good point.

YAELA
Alright so, if we can’t find a boat, we’ll make one.

VURIETH
[sighs] If we must.

[They begin to move around, searching for materials.]

VURIETH
Balink, I would be interested to hear more about this… bang-fishing, if you don’t mind?

BALINK
Oh, well, see, it’s a bit of a story but, well, the Master of Goblinport has – or I should say, had – this big ornamental pond. Huge thing, full of fish. One day I was really hungry and didn’t have much money and, well, long story short, I… am not allowed in Goblinport anymore.

VURIETH
I see…but how did –

BALINK
Oh, hey, look, this log looks sea-worthy! Wheeee!

[There’s a loud splash followed by bubbles as the log sinks.]

BALINK
… Maybe not.

VURIETH
I am afraid neither of us has any experience with boats, hey, little one?

BALINK
Nah… shall we just look for wood or something?

VURIETH
I think we are up to that task, yes.

BALINK
Alrighty!

[They head off, and continue to search for materials.]

LAETHAR
Yes, and those – if we can attach them here…

YAELA
We still need more wood. This will never have enough space for all five of us.

BALINK
[panting] Will this do?

[He heaves a tree branch and drops it at their feet.]

YAELA
This will definitely help.

BALINK
[panting] Oh, thank Blood for that.

[Balink begins sniffing]

AIOLIN
[distantly] Here, I found more fallen trees.

VURIETH
Yes, there is quite a few back there.

LAETHAR
Seems odd that so many trees have fallen in these parts.

YAELA
Maybe there was a storm recently?

LAETHAR
Hm, maybe.

BALINK
You guys noticed that smell?

VURIETH
I had, yes.

YAELA
Me too. There’s definitely something foul on the wind.

AIOLIN
Well, we’re a long way from any settlements. Who knows what’s lurking around out here.

LAETHAR
Well I’m not in any hurry to find out.

AIOLIN
Agreed.

VURIETH
I suppose we should get to work then.

[They begin tightening ropes and moving logs, and we transition to them beginning to sail down the river.]

YAELA
Alright, looks like we’re making decent speed. How’s steering going?

LAETHAR
[grunts] It’s not the best tiller I’ve ever manned, but it will serve.

VURIETH
Are we certain this will hold?

LAETHAR/YAELA
[simultaneously] No.

AIOLIN
Look, it can take my weight plus all of you, the thing’s good enough.

BALINK
I used every scrap of our rope binding it all together!

[He rocks the raft, and water splashes.]

YAELA
Binks, stay still!

BALINK
I reckon it’ll hold… I think it’ll hold.

AIOLIN
See, and he hates water.

VURIETH
I am not overly keen on it myself.

BALINK
Yeah but I have an ingenious backup plan for if we do sink.

VURIETH
Which is?

BALINK
Balance on your heads.

VURIETH
You would stand on us as we drowned?

BALINK
I mean, not like I could drag all of you out the river is it?

VURIETH
That is true, little one. I would be glad that you at least survived.

AIOLIN
Could you stop being so bloody morbid? I am trying to concentrate.

BALINK
You still working on that?

AIOLIN
You mean the language that no one has read or spoken since the Dawn Ages of the World? No, I figured that all out in about ten minutes.

BALINK
I always knew you could do it.

VURIETH
How – I mean, ah, h-how is the translating going, my friend?

AIOLIN
Slow going. Problem is Arwaena is based on phonetic syllables and, from what I remember, is very interpretive while Elvish most definitely is not. A linguist could probably make quick work of this but I’m no linguist.

VURIETH
[deflated] Oh.

YAELA
Have heart, Vurieth. The process won’t be easy, we knew this.

VURIETH
I do, I do. I apologise Aiolin, I am just restless.

AIOLIN
I understand. I’m working as fast as I can.

VURIETH
Thank you, my friend.

BALINK
Aiolin, didn’t you say that some of that stone stuff was written in Deeper?

AIOLIN
Yes. Unfortunately since I don’t even know the Astimgerdum runes, that part is useless. I’m having to rely solely on the bit written using the teithawen. Fortunately it’s High Elven, so I don’t need to worry about dialects.

BALINK
The teeth-a-who now?

AIOLIN
[sighs] Elven letters. But even though it’s extensive, it’s taking ages to… to… Belakh, I’m an idiot. You read Deeper, don’t you?

BALINK
Yep. You kinda pick it up when you hang around a lot of criminals. You want me to translate that bit for you?

AIOLIN
I’ll take all the help I can get.

BALINK
Righto!

[Balink sits beside Aiolin, paper rustling as he mutters to himself.]

VURIETH
Will we have the chance to go ashore some time today?

YAELA
I suppose so. It should not be long though.

BALINK
Good. I don’t fancy kipping on this thing.

LAETHAR
If the wind keeps up and these currents are anything to go by, we should be carried at a good pace. Though someone must be on watch in case we meet any obstacles.

BALINK
Obstacles? What, like, if we run into a hippo or something?

LAETHAR
Or something.

YAELA
That smell’s back.

BALINK
[sniffs] I think it’s stronger than it was last time.

YAELA
Yes, you’re right, it is.

VURIETH
Do you think something is out there, getting closer?

LAETHAR
Probably. The question is, is it coming to us, or are we simply drawing closer to it?

BALINK
Not sure which is worse.

YAELA
It might be nothing. Let’s just stay alert.

[Further down the river, Balink and Vurieth talk at the rear of the raft, Yaela and Laethar talk at the front, and Aiolin sits in the middle, scribbling.]

YAELA
Are you certain you won’t join me? The water is cool and refreshing!

LAETHAR
I shall keep my boots on, thank you.

[Yaela makes a disappointed sound and splashes in the water.]

YAELA
Spoilsport.

LAETHAR
I am keeping a lookout which, I’d remind you, was your idea. Besides, I am spoiling nothing for you by not sticking my feet in that river.

YAELA
You are spoiling this opportunity for a beautiful bonding experience.

LAETHAR
[chuckles] What?

YAELA
You can keep just as good a lookout sitting here with me as you could stood there. The smell is gone and we’ve seen nothing for ages. Can you just be nice for once? For me?

LAETHAR
[sighs] Alright.

[At the back of the raft, Balink and Vurieth talk.]

BALINK
Go on, please?

VURIETH
I do not know if that is wise, my friend.

BALINK
Come on, my eyes hurt from all that reading. Please?

VURIETH
I…

BALINK
Please? I’ll shine your shoes!

VURIETH
That will not be necessary, little one.

BALINK
Fiine, then I’ll… I’ll… give you my last apple!

VURIETH
I could never deprive you of your rations, my friend.

BALINK
But you need to check and see how it’s doing! And I really wanna see your super cool magic again!

VURIETH
It might not even work…

BALINK
That’s why you need to test it! Please? I’ll….give you a foot rub?

VURIETH
[sighing] That… actually sounds very nice. I will agree to those terms. And you do have a point, I should keep an eye on my abilities. For all I know it may have gotten better. Or worse…

BALINK
Yay! Do something with fire!

VURIETH
Fire, are you sure?

BALINK
We’re on water, it’d be the safest spell you could pick!

VURIETH
I suppose that makes sense. Alright, little one. I shall try.

BALINK
Fireball! Fireball! Fireball!

AIOLIN/LAETHAR
[simultaneously] Wait, what?

YAELA
What’s this about a fireb-

VURIETH
Pilignatus!

[A bolt of fire explodes, and Balink shrieks in delight. Vurieth breathes heavily, rubbing their hands together.]

BALINK
Did it get you?

VURIETH
Oh no, no, I am fine really, it just scalded my fingertips a little.

YAELA
Are you alright?

LAETHAR
Was that entirely necessary?

BALINK
Yes!

VURIETH
Balink made a good point that, with my magic being unpredictable lately, I ought to test myself sometimes, to see how I am faring.

YAELA
I see. And it has nothing to do with seeing large explosions?

BALINK
… No… it’s all about helping.

LAETHAR
So, what are the results?

VURIETH
Well, I used to be able to cast three or four spells of that strength in a day. But that one has drained a lot of my power.

BALINK
But that was the spell you were going for, right?

VURIETH
Yes, but, it was stronger. And much more, well, exhausting.

BALINK
So… like… it wasn’t totally under control?

VURIETH
Not quite, no.

BALINK
Huh…

YAELA
Though I wouldn’t recommend doing such large spells out in the open like this, it is probably a good idea to keep practicing, just in case there are any changes.

VURIETH
I agree.

LAETHAR
But could you choose a less alarming spell next time?

BALINK
[whispering] Dare you to cast a lightning spike right next to Laethar.

VURIETH
Hush.

YAELA
I shall pretend I did not hear that.

LAETHAR
Hear what?

YAELA
Nothing to worry about. Aiolin, would you like some food? You have not stopped since we set off.

AIOLIN
… Same rune here and here so that must mean… “instead?” No, “an alternative” – yes, that’s it… hm, sorry, what did you say?

YAELA
Have some lunch.

AIOLIN
Oh, thanks. I didn’t realise the time. Have we travelled far?

YAELA
Several miles now. How are the translations?

AIOLIN
Tricky, but I think I’m making progress.

YAELA
Do not push yourself too hard, take breaks when you need them.

AIOLIN
I will be alright. Of course, it would be quicker if I was as fast with the Deeper translations, but Balink has been doing what he can.

YAELA
Binks, get back over here and help. Binks! Binks, are you even  listening?

BALINK
No way! Look, a boat – a boat!

YAELA
Where?

BALINK
Left bank! No, no my left!

YAELA
By the… it is a boat!

LAETHAR
You want to try to stop and investigate?

VURIETH
Wait…

AIOLIN
You see something?

VURIETH
Yes, look – the back half is missing.

AIOLIN
Blood…

BALINK
What could have done that?

VURIETH
Perhaps it simply ran aground…

YAELA
I doubt it. That thing’s completely wrecked.

AIOLIN
Look at it, a metal hull and it’s just been… pulled apart.

LAETHAR
Or…

BALINK
Or what?

LAETHAR
Or, they were attacked. Torn to shreds. Destroyed.

AIOLIN
By who? Or what? We’re in the middle of nowhere!

LAETHAR
Precisely my concern.

BALINK
You’re not thinking –

LAETHAR
In my experience, only one kind of person does something like that.

YAELA
Best be on guard. They’ve probably moved on by now, but just in case.

LAETHAR
Boots back on too, I think.

[Yaela sighs. Further down the river, the party sails as evening closes in.]

BALINK
Can you lot see alright?

LAETHAR
Just enough.

VURIETH
I do not like the idea of just drifting in the darkness. If one of us fell in we may not notice.

LAETHAR
We’ll land as soon as possible.

[Paper is rolled up.]

AIOLIN
Alright, I’ve done as much as I can now the light’s gone. Are we stopping or carrying on through the night?

YAELA
Ideally stopping. But both banks have been nothing but bog for the last few hours.

[Balink groans.]

BALINK
I smell the smell again. And it’s gotten worse…

YAELA
[choked up slightly] Yes, I agree. What is that?

LAETHAR
I think you know well what it is. It’s death.

BALINK
Always have to leap to the worst conclusions, don’t you?

LAETHAR
I’ve seen many wars in my lifetime. Trust me, I know what death smells like.

YAELA
Perhaps an animal died somewhere downstream? The carcass could be the cause of this stench.

AIOLIN
Must be a hell of an animal.

LAETHAR
You know as well as I do that it’s no beast. Think of the boat we passed. It has to be-

[The raft lurches violently, and they all cling to it.]

BALINK
Whoa!

YAELA
What was that?

VURIETH
We hit something.

AIOLIN
Ugh! Must have been a rock somewhere we didn’t notice. Serves us right for not going ashore when it got dark I suppose.

LAETHAR
I do not think so.

YAELA
Have we run aground? It could be the bank.

BALINK
Let me have a look.

YAELA
Be careful!

BALINK
Don’t worry so much! Alright, let’s see…

[Balink’s hands smack into something wet, and he makes a noise of disgust.]

YAELA
What is it?

BALINK
Big wall, like a dam. Huh… think some big beaver things have been hanging out up here? Oh wait, no. Not made of no wood or stone… it’s more like… smushy. Oh, wait – there’s a hard thing here…

[It squelches.]

BALINK
It’s… broken, snapped, it’s all slimy… oh, and there’s a belt buckle!

LAETHAR
A belt buckle?

BALINK
Yeah, let me see… oh… oh no, it’s not a dam. It’s bodies!

VURIETH
Oh my…

LAETHAR
Get back!

AIOLIN
Could we get some light?

VURIETH
Piluminus! Ouch!

BALINK
You alright?

VURIETH 
Yes, ow! Just – scalded myself.

AIOLIN
Spell worked though, that’s something.

YAELA
So… are they..?

LAETHAR
Look at them, of course they are dead!

BALINK
There must be dozens of them. Goes all across the river!

VURIETH
But who… what did this?

LAETHAR
Remember the boat? There’s only one thing that could have done something like this.

AIOLIN
Wasters.

BALINK
Oh snot.

YAELA
I’ve never heard of Wasters building things with the dead before.

LAETHAR
I doubt they did. These bodies were probably dumped upstream and then carried down here. My guess is a few were caught on something, maybe some rocks, and then they all started piling up.

VURIETH
But where did they all come from?

AIOLIN
Somewhere up in the mountains?

LAETHAR
Vurieth, bring that light closer, would you? Yes, like I thought.

YAELA
What?

LAETHAR
See here? The burns and scarring all over the bodies.

YAELA
I’d rather not look, if I’m perfectly honest.

AIOLIN
What does that mean?

LAETHAR
It means that these were not Waster victims…or, I suppose they were in a way. But all of them were Wasters.

AIOLIN
By the Blood. What could kill that many?

LAETHAR
Other Wasters most likely.

YAELA
A clan war?

LAETHAR
It happens, especially in places like this. Nothing and no one else to kill or destroy, so they attack each other.

BALINK
So, we’re in the clear, right? They all killed each other.

YAELA
We don’t know for sure.

LAETHAR
Well I think we’d know by n-

[A Waster shrieks.]

VURIETH
Laethar! Get back!

[Laethar and Balink scramble back as Wasters begin climbing out of the dam.]

YAELA
They’re still alive!

AIOLIN
Were they waiting?

LAETHAR
Must have been. Never heard of them doing that before though.

BALINK
Who cares about that?! Vurieth, dust these scrubs!

VURIETH
Congrego Arcana! Fulgunda!

[There’s an electrical crackle that immediately dies out.]

BALINK
Well, that’s not ideal.

[The Wasters jump onto the raft and into the water. Laethar draws his blade.]

LAETHAR
Aiolin, watch out!

[There’s a heavy impact, and a waster grunts in pain.]

AIOLIN
That’ll learn ya!

BALINK
Haha, I get it! ’Cause books.

[There’s another splash.]

YAELA
Nice one!

[Her bowstring twangs. Another splash.]

LAETHAR
There’s more coming.

[They continue to fight. Vurieth tries to concentrate on their magic.]

VURIETH
Come on! Come on!

AIOLIN
Vurieth, behind you!

CAPTAIN DUILIO
Archers! Loose!

[A large number of bows twang as arrows fly into the sky.]

LAETHAR
Watch out!

[There are two splashes as Laethar and Aiolin dive into the water to try and avoid the arrows.]

VURIETH
[desperately] Escutassenda!

[A magical shield blossoms above Vurieth, Yaela and Balink. The arrows crash down, hitting the Wasters and the shield.]

YAELA
Vurieth, you saved us.

VURIETH
I did?

BALINK
Nice work!

[Aiolin and Laethar resurface, Laethar spitting water.]

LAETHAR
Yes, well done Ashlander. Now would you mind helping us too?

YAELA
I’ve got you.

[Yaela pulls Laethar up onto the raft, and Balink helps Aiolin.]

BALINK
Up you come, big guy.

AIOLIN
[grunts] Thanks.

LAETHAR
Yes, thanks indeed. Now, what say we go have a word with those fellows?

BALINK
You mean the ones who tried to kill us?

YAELA
I don’t think they were shooting at us. They’re not nocking any more arrows anyway.

LAETHAR
No, they just didn’t care if they took us out too. Let’s go have a word, shall we?

[Dice roll and clatter at the gaming table.]

WILL
Yeah, I’m gonna punch someone.

GINA
[amused] Watch out, Laethar’s angry.

WILL
Damn right I’m angry, these guys nearly just took us all out!

ROSIE
Good thing we had Vurieth, hey?

MATT
Yeah, when the magic decided to work.

LEAH
Maybe they just really wanted to protect us.

MATT
Swear to god, if this is some “the magic was in friendship all along” thing –

[The players laugh.]

GAME MASTER
No, don’t worry, it’s all random chance. Lucky for you guys. But, unfortunately, that is where we’ll have to stop for now. Thank you to all of you who joined us this week. Join us again next time.

[The end theme plays and the Announcer recites the credits]